Deanna ([personal profile] dr4b) wrote2009-01-26 03:15 pm

My dad

apparently will no longer be reading my LJ entries, because he died sometime in the last day or two.

The funeral is probably this Friday; I'm trying to figure out how I'll get back to Philly.

I guess I'm taking this pretty well all things considered. I haven't cried, which is surprising my family. I guess I kind of knew when I saw him that it was very likely to be the last time I'd see him alive... I just didn't think he would go so SUDDENLY. He wasn't in the hospital or anything when he died... my uncle calls him every day and basically got no answer on any of his phones today, so drove downtown and said he just found my dad laying there in bed looking like he was asleep.

My brother called me this afternoon. We're not sure what we'll do exactly.
My uncle suggests I come to Philly this week for the funeral and we'll figure things out.

I'm thinking that I might extend my Seattle trip in late February to make up for this -- that is, I'm still going to go back to Japan on Feb 3rd, take care of some things I need to take care of there (some job interviews and other such stuff), then come back to Seattle mid-February and stay for Puzzle Hunt, then go back to Japan for the WBC and hopefully starting a job. I might work another Philly trip in February if necessary. We'll see.

This is a photo I took the last morning I was in Philly (Jan 9th... was it REALLY only two weeks ago? My gosh...) I know I have better photos of him, but it's just, this is what I saw for two months of my life while hanging out there. You can see that behind his computer table/desk, he keeps a photo of me and him, and then photos of his tumors. It was always kind of disturbing, but I guess now that I think about it, were those the most important things in his life?



He's still logged into AIM. (When my brother called, we noticed Dad had an idle time of 2 days and 10 hours, which should have been a telltale sign that something was wrong, actually.) My uncle's at the apartment and says he's afraid to turn off any computers because none of us know any of the right passwords for anything.

Anyway, I dunno. Gotta go figure out what I'm going to do.

[identity profile] wandelrust.livejournal.com 2009-01-27 02:29 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm sorry Dee. It sounds like getting to see you was important to him, and once he did that he went pretty peacefully. I'm glad you got to spend time with him.

[identity profile] guitarcries.livejournal.com 2009-01-27 02:30 pm (UTC)(link)
So sorry to hear about this, Deanna. :(

[identity profile] lifeofmendel.livejournal.com 2009-01-27 02:33 pm (UTC)(link)
*big hugs*

just now catching up on my friends page, sorry i'm late. i read your later entry before i read this one, which was a little odd.

anyway, you have my number if for some reason ou want to call.

[identity profile] firimari.livejournal.com 2009-01-27 02:55 pm (UTC)(link)
Condolences, Dee. I hope getting things settled is no more stressful than it ought to be.

[identity profile] captain-squid.livejournal.com 2009-01-27 03:19 pm (UTC)(link)
My deepest condolences, D. May you find strength in the coming days.

[identity profile] arashink.livejournal.com 2009-01-27 03:20 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm sorry to hear that. You have my sincerest condolences.

[identity profile] teki.livejournal.com 2009-01-27 04:33 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm so sorry to hear this. I'll keep a duck out for you.

[identity profile] tanuwa.livejournal.com 2009-01-27 04:55 pm (UTC)(link)
My condolences, Deanna - take care of yourself.

[identity profile] skydiamonde.livejournal.com 2009-01-27 07:49 pm (UTC)(link)
*hug*

[identity profile] nickjong.livejournal.com 2009-01-27 08:51 pm (UTC)(link)
I don't know what to say. I can only imagine how you might feel. I will keep you in my thoughts. Be well.

Oh Dea!

[identity profile] ariel72.livejournal.com 2009-01-27 11:00 pm (UTC)(link)
I am very sorry to hear about your loss!!!

Hugs, love and warm wishes for you... Please know that you did a good thing spending the last few weeks with him (before Seattle).

If there was anything I could do for you, just name it. You won't be in town very long, but I'm still kind of local.

-EBG

[identity profile] nstrom.livejournal.com 2009-01-28 12:35 am (UTC)(link)
I'm sorry D.

[identity profile] genuinekfc.livejournal.com 2009-01-28 01:35 am (UTC)(link)
My condolences. It's never easy to go through. Grief can be delayed or take odd forms. At least you got to spend some time with him near the end.

[identity profile] jd7a.livejournal.com 2009-01-28 03:31 am (UTC)(link)
*hugs*
you'll be in our thoughts
flatvurm: (running bread)

[personal profile] flatvurm 2009-01-28 06:32 am (UTC)(link)
Hey, Deanna. I know we haven't had a lot of contact of late, but...I just wanted to express my condolences anyway. I'm sorry for your loss.

[identity profile] sinthrex.livejournal.com 2009-01-28 06:42 am (UTC)(link)
I'm sorry Deanna. Let us know if we can do anything.

[identity profile] kawaru.livejournal.com 2009-01-28 09:32 am (UTC)(link)
Deanna, I'm so sorry.

[identity profile] meggitymeg.livejournal.com 2009-01-28 07:48 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm really sorry to hear this, Deanna. I know the event itself wasn't unexpected, but the rapidity with which it came to pass certainly was. *squeezes you*

[identity profile] random-boy.livejournal.com 2009-01-29 01:22 am (UTC)(link)
*hugs*

[identity profile] fiannaharpar.livejournal.com 2009-01-29 09:20 pm (UTC)(link)
I finally had time to comment, Ray told me when it happened. I'm so sorry and we are praying for you and your family.

[identity profile] cmhoulahan.livejournal.com 2009-01-30 03:46 am (UTC)(link)
So sorry for your loss. My thoughts are with you & your family.

[identity profile] dgr.livejournal.com 2009-01-30 05:47 am (UTC)(link)
Sorry to hear that, Dee.

[identity profile] mg4h.livejournal.com 2009-01-30 05:02 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm sorry. I'm just catching up on lj now, and just saw this. You're probably busy at the funeral by now.

I'm happy you were able to spend some time with him near the end, at least you have more memories stored up now. And having seen the alternative, I hope you can know how much better his passing was dying peacefully in his sleep at home.

*HUG*

[identity profile] samildanach.livejournal.com 2009-02-01 11:55 pm (UTC)(link)
Deanna, my condolences to you and your family! If there's anything we can do, please let us know.

[identity profile] mithramuse.livejournal.com 2009-03-17 02:49 pm (UTC)(link)
Way-way-way late on this, but figured it was more appropriate here than as a random aside in a more recent post -- so sorry for your loss! And doubly sorry that we couldn't get together when you were in Philly.

Seems like things are getting better -- I know family deaths can hit in an odd way, have lost all my grandparents now, though fortunately neither of my parents -- so hope things keep going well, stay cheerful and all that!

And hope to see you again before too long, though for various reasons (per today's entry) it may be a bit before I travel.

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