Baseball Filk -- "Good Morning Baltimore"

This is dedicated to Eric Byrnes, former Oakland A's outfielder, then Colorado Rockies outfielder, and suddenly as of yesterday, Baltimore Orioles outfielder. Of course, if I was him and I ever saw this, I'd probably get pretty pissed off, but ah well, that's never stopped me before, right? I was, like, listening to the cast recording of Hairspray, and thinking of his wild blonde hair flying as he chases after pop flies, and suddenly I came up with this idea...



"Good Morning Baltimore"
(to the tune of the same song title from the musical Hairspray
new lyrics by Deanna Rubin, of course)


BYRNES:
Oh, oh, oh
Woke up today
Feeling the way I always do
Oh, oh, oh
Looking for somewhere
That I can play
Almost every day

The trade deadline's on
And once more I'm gone
Away from Coors Field
With my bat and glove
Oh, oh, oh
Sending me back
To the fans and the league that I love

Good morning Baltimore,
Every day I can hear you roar
Every night is a game for me
Every crowd's like a symphony

Good morning Baltimore,
As I promise you runs I will score,
The league's gonna wake up and see
Baltimore and me


Oh, oh, oh
Look at my hair
What 'do can compare with mine today?
Oh, oh, oh,
I've got my spikes and my bat and ball
I'm ready to roll

I go up to greet
The fans in their seat
They seem to say
"Byrnesie, it's up to you."
So, oh oh
Please let me play
'Cause today I'll hit home runs for you!

Good morning Baltimore
Here's a field that I will explore
There's a dent in the outfield wall
It's a good place for a fly ball

Good morning Baltimore
As I open my new locker door
The team's gonna come in and see
Baltimore and me


I see every pitch
I make every throw
I run every place that I should go
I'm jumpin' to run when the ball leaves the mound
So please hit it out here before I fall down!

TEAMMATES:
Before he falls down!


BYRNES (& TEAMMATES):
So, oh, oh
Put me in coach
You'll like my approach when I hit the ball
Oh, oh, oh
Something inside of me makes me race
To get to first base

The coach tells me no
But my feet tell me go!
It's like a calling I've never heard
Oh, oh, oh
Don't make me wait
One more moment to take off for third!

TEAMMATES:
Good morning, good morning,
He's gonna take off for third!


BYRNES (& TEAMMATES):
I love you Baltimore
Every game's like an open door
Every inning's a joy to me
Every benching's a misery

And I promise Baltimore
That today, I can't wait anymore
The league's gonna wake up and see
Gonna wake up and see,
Baltimore and me...

TEAMMATES:
Yes, more or less we all agree

BYRNES:
Baltimore and me...

TEAMMATES:
Today the league is gonna see

BYRNES:
Baltimore and me!

Mariners lose, the weather's too hot, Indian food is good, and so is japanese TV

Oh, um, and for a real update, well, today I hung out with oren. We went to the Mariners-Indians game, which was a real sleeper -- it was just super-hot outside, and I was tired, and the game was pretty boring after the first two innings, which took like an hour. I'd said before the game, "The Indians are going to win," and of course, they did. I think the most exciting thing to happen during the game was when a section a few down from us all got up to sing happy 100th birthday to some lady. I was like, "Wow, she was born at the end of July 1905... that's a long time ago. I mean, like, that's about when Ty Cobb started playing baseball." (for the record: August 30 1905)

Blah blah. Afterwards we went to Oren's place and watched a bit of the White Sox - Orioles game on ESPN. I really just wanted to see Freddy Garcia pitch, but the Sox had to go and bat around the entire lineup in the first inning, so it took like 35 minutes before I got to see the Orioles come up. Apparently the slugfest ended in a 9-4 win for the Sox, though Brian Roberts and Eric Byrnes apparently hit back-to-back solo homers in the 8th, which is cool. (For Byrnes. I still hate the Orioles.)

We didn't see the rest of the game, though, since we watched the first episode of the live-action version of 逮捕しちゃうぞ; it's been about 7-8 years since I saw the anime of that, so I barely remember it except "it has two crazy cop chicks named Natsumi and Miyuki", but the live-action show was actually pretty good; I've always kinda enjoyed Japanese cop sitcoms ever since we all watched 踊る大捜査線 on the international channel back in college. After one episode we went to get dinner of Taste of India. I called Carl and left a message like "Hey Carl, it's Sunday night and Oren and I just watched a dorama and are now going to ToI, wanna come?" Unfortunately, I caught him during Firefly, but we talked later while we were back at Oren's watching another episode of Taiho. Hopefully we'll actually watch all of it eventually, and hopefully Carl will come visit soon!

Then uh, I came back here and wrote another parody song because I am a dork. And now I should sleep or I'll never get up on time.